Sunday, March 20, 2011

On Double Tasking in the Bathroom

Story #1:
I have been relatively shy about sharing my blog with friends. I don't exactly want to filter what I write because I think that the best blogs are the entries where I am not embarrassed to share revealing stories about myself (or my poor fiance who unfortunately for him is discussed in many a posting.) Warning.... this post is about potty humor.

I have slowly and reluctantly released my blog address to some friends here and there in hopes to gain more self confidence in my writing along the way. I decided to give my blog address to a friend of mine a few weeks ago. This particular friend owns an iphone.

This friend has told me multiple times that he does 90% of his recreational internet surfing/Facebook stalking while on the toilet. Gross me out, ok? This has become a running joke amongst my amigos about how my friend often comments on photos and wall post while sitting on the John.

The day after I gave him my blog address, I said "By the way! Don't read my blog while on the toilet!!!" He responded: "Too late."

Story #2:
I am not a fan of chatter across stalls. When I am in the ladies room I don't want to talk to you or anyone else. I will talk to you on the way in, while washing my hands, and walking out; however, when it comes to when I am in the stall... let's stop the conversation. Thanks.

The only time I will make an exception is if my neighbor needs some toilet paper. I will always gratefully help my neighbor girl out when she is in a pinch. And in the very rare occassion where I will for some reason forget to check the toilet paper stock; I will ask my neighbor for a square or two.

The majority of people at my company are men. There are only a few women in my building. So few that there is not even a ladies room on my floor. We first floor ladies have to walk upstairs to use the facilities.

The other day I was walking to the restroom when a woman who I know walked in right behind me. We started a conversation about the political unrest in Libya. I did my obligatory convo cut off statement, ya know like "Yeah, it is scary stuff. I really hope it all gets sorted out soon. Enjoy your day!" I walked into the stall, locked the door...and the convo. kept. going. Not only do I not want to talk while in the stall, I especially do not want to talk about politics. Unacceptable. I peed as fast as I could and then washed my hands, said a nice closing statement about my feelings on Libya and fled that situation.

Highlight the text after the star to reveal which story is true * The true story is story number one. It is true that my friend has read my blog while sitting on the John! Funny, yet dirty. Although it is true that I don't enjoy conversations while in the restroom, I work with so few women that I am never really in the restroom with anyone else. Winning! (Charlie Sheen... I had to do it)

1 comment:

  1. I can't believe I got this one wrong! Today I am not a #winner.